Hey friends and family,
7 weeks in Malawi: check! This past week had its ups and downs. I had a great 2nd session at Mvunguti Primary on Wednesday. We talked about violence at home and girls’ rights. I love talking to girls about their rights here in Africa, because so many girls don’t understand that they are entitled to basic respect from their peers and their parents. Many just sat in front of me listening contently, and it hit me that our session may have been the first time some of these girls had ever heard that they are of equal worth and importance to their male counterparts. I did the same session yesterday at Kalambo Primary, and it went even better than Wednesday’s discussion. The girls at Kalambo are a bit younger, and really jumped in and participated. It was great to hear that many had already heard about their right to education, right to protection, etc. I felt that they were really involved and learned a lot. My colleague asked at the end of the session how many enjoyed our discussion, and every little hand shot up. Really encouraging.
On the frustrating side of things, there is a 3rd school, Kabwabwa Primary, where I am supposed to be running sessions on Thursday afternoons. However, as of now, we have yet to even introduce the program there and register girls to attend. My colleague asked the head teacher of the school if we could just start next Thursday- (better late than never). She responded by saying that she didn’t know if Thursdays would work from now on, because students are about to start writing exams. As I attempted to listen to my colleague explain the situation, I could feel frustration boiling up inside me. I tried to appear calm when I inquired as to whether the other 2 schools would be starting exams as well. He said yes. GREAT, I thought… as soon as I finally get in the schools and start to make some progress, our schedules might be completely thrown off, and some schools may even tell us not to bother coming anymore. I feel powerless against this process, and I just have to hold my breath and cross my fingers that the schools will not allow exams to interfere with our program. I hope they will continue to be accommodating and will allow for us to come at different times, to fit in with the exam schedule, and will not just dismiss us completely. But, as I’ve come to learn in Africa- there are often no straight answers, and no assurances of anything being a sure thing.
Moving on to another topic… last week I forgot my sunglasses at home when I left for work. Instantly I felt panicky and I considered asking Alice (who was driving me to work) to turn back so I could get them. It was then that I realized the dependence I have on my sunglasses, and how much I rely on them, not only to help me to see clearly in the bright African sun, but to ensure that those around me cannot see me. I realized that my sunglasses protect me from displaying my emotions… emotions that are quite usually fear, panic and anxiety. My glasses are my confidence, my mask. I can hide behind them and take in a chaotic, out-of-this world scene, without having my feelings about the situation displayed to the world around me. No one can remark on a particular reaction I display, no one can make eye contact with me and hammer me with questions. On my day with no glasses, I realized it’s a bit scary to look people in the eye, and to have them examine me. I felt uncomfortable actually making eye contact with men staring me down in the street. And for the first time, I realized the dual uses that my glasses hold in my life here in Malawi- to protect me from the sun, and from potentially uncomfortable scenarios. But I didn’t come here to be comfortable. Who flies halfway across the world to a developing nation to be comfortable? I felt silly. Since that day, I have still been wearing my glasses out and about.. (gotta protect my eyes!) But, I am being more conscientious about taking them off in the mini bus, or when I’m having a conversation with a stranger. It leaves me more vulnerable, yes, but it leaves me more satisfied, that I might have made a deeper connection with another person.
My ongoing routine here in Lilongwe is making time chug along quite quickly. I can’t believe next week will be November already and my time left here will be in the 30-day range! Call me a pansy but, my homesick heart has longed to go home since day 1. HOWEVER, I have never actually wanted to follow through with that desire, and I’m glad I still have just over a month here to see and do everything I want to do, as difficult as it remains to be far away from home.
Love to all,
Jacqueline
P.S. Follow this link to view my pictures even without a facebook account: http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2295355&id=72603882&l=e9ab8dfebd
No comments:
Post a Comment